A rumor has been going around that Disney wants to make super-progressive changes to the Carousel of Progress. It all came from a satirical site Mouse Trap News. No. Disney has not announced plans to make the attraction “woke.” It’s clearly a satirical piece.

What did Mouse Trap News say to rile people up?

It’s so over the top, and that’s the point.

The “rumor” states that Disney is finally going to update the final scene in the attraction. Now instead of a Christmas celebration, it’s going to be a Christmas, Hanukkah, and Kwanza celebration, so they are more inclusive and can cover all three winter celebrations.

If you were like me, asking, “How would the white family do Kwanza? ” Well, they even came up with an answer for that too. A new African American animatronic would be added to the finale. He would be Jimmy’s boyfriend, visiting for the holidays.

But that’s not the only change that the ride will jump 80 years into. In this “reimagined” version of Walt Disney’s beloved attraction, Patricia, the daughter in the story, would now be Pat and would be the first transgender animatronic. Pat would appear as male and not female.

For those unfamiliar with the Carousel of Progress it is a ride at Walt Disney World’s Magic Kingdom. It was designed by Walt Disney and sponsored by General Electric for the 1964 World’s Fair to showcase the progress of innovation and electricity. The attraction features a family in the 1900’s, 1920s, 1940’s and then the “modern year” finale.

It was moved to Disneyland and then later moved to Walt Disney World where it has been since 1975.

The finale is in dire need of an update and has been for a while. Which is the basis of the rumor.

While Disney is updating and changing things for their idea of “modern audiences,” this is clearly a parody. Don’t freak out. Don’t scream “Woke Disney.”  It’s a joke. Disney’s behavior has made it a very believable joke, but it’s likely not true.

Plus people would riot if Grandma was replaced by Jimmy’s boyfriend. Everyone loves Grandma.