WandaVision Episode 6 Review: The Hype That Isn’t

Vision dressed in his classic comic outfit. It's a green hooded body suit, with yellow diamond on the chest and yellow cape.

I want you to understand something before we dive into this review. Do you know that there is an entire ecosystem of reviewers, websites, YouTubers, and more, whose sole job is to hype particular movies and series in order to drive a narrative for the corporations? If you don’t, they’re sometimes called shills… it’s a pejorative, but it is out there to describe people and companies who need access to entertainment companies, and will therefore say and do things in order to maintain their access.

We’re not that way at Pirates and Princesses. So if you’re here to read a non-stop glowfiesta about how great WandaVision is, you’ve come to the wrong place. I’ve rated some episodes as high as a B, I’ve given some episodes an F, and I’m waiting for something that would put this anywhere close to The Mandalorian in terms of excitement. Frankly, I just don’t think that’s there, and I believe all the hype they’re trying to build for WandaVision is as fake as the small town Wanda has created. It’s as fake as the Super Bowl ratings that we pretty much exclusively exposed here on Pirates and Princesses and delved into how those fake ratings were created. New OOH Stat Used to Inflate Super Bowl Ratings

Now, all of that said, there were some things that I really like about WandaVision, and I’m happy to continue enjoying. Paul Bettany as Vision is marvelous. Elizabeth Olson as Wanda / The Scarlett Witch is wonderful. Kathryn Hahn playing Agnes is a character we’d all love to see for a good long while. This whole new twist with Quicksilver — super cool, and I love it. But there are some things that are severely holding back this series, other than people Canceling Disney+ over a plethora of horrible things Disney is up to lately (and for those of you just now paying attention, using and thanking entities that run concentration camps is a non-partisan reason far worse than them firing Gina Carano). So as much as I enjoy watching the evolving sitcom world unravel – and by the way, it doesn’t seem anyone cares about why the world is moving through sitcom phases and it makes no sense at all – I’m sucked back into these things that suck about WandaVision. Let me outline these for you:

1. This series struggles with continuity. For example, Beanie-head Darcie was introduced to us as an insufferable astrophysicist who just needs freaking coffee during her first appearance. In Episode 6, she’s a genius computer hacker and everyone knows this despite it never having been stated ever before. Another example is that we were originally told that in order to watch this weird WandaVision thing, you needed an older TV, but now we’ve seen WandaVision on a modern screen. The internal logic of the series is broken over and over, and it all just makes it seem less like an ingenious puzzle, and more like some cool ideas thrown on a dartboard.

2. Every time we exit the WandaVision world, this show is as unbelievable as you can possibly get. For example, we’ve never seen any indication that Monica or Agent Woo have the physical prowess to win a one-on-one fight, yet here they disarm professional security agents in a matter of seconds in a scene more horribly choreographed than Rey and Kylo versus Snoke. They should make a movie called “Rambeau: Unleash the Woo”. These two are suddenly made to look more powerful than Captain America in seconds, as if that’s totally normal. As if that isn’t jumping the shark badly enough, they then follow that up literally with the three cartoon characters donning hoody jackets which allow them to sneak around a maximum security site undetected. And as utterly stupid as that is, I’m wondering why they should even do that? Rambeau and Woo can clearly just beat the **** out of every single person on that site without breaking a sweat, so why hide in rain ponchos? Do you think Ironman goes around wearing Groucho Marx glasses the minute the script calls for him to stop beating up bad guys?

3. I don’t know how long we’ve had this purple/red bubble thing around an entire New Jersey town, but I’ve seen a few maps before. New Jersey seems to have several population centers and be near semi-big towns like… I don’t know… New York City, maybe? How in the ever-loving $%@@#$!%# does nobody outside of S.W.O.R.D. and the FBI notice there’s a giant purple/red wall incapsulating a city like the storm from Fortnite and the goo on the museum from Ghostbusters 2 had a baby? Does nobody have cell phones? Where is the press?

I don’t enjoy being negative though, so let me add here that I did love seeing Wanda and Vision in their comic book costumes. And everything to do with Vision leaving the town and falling apart was nearly perfection. The people being limited at the outer reaches of the town because Wanda only has so much power – super cool touch, and makes me wish all the more this had been played as a psychological thriller. I weep a little that Vision didn’t take Mustache Man along for the ride. We miss you, Mustachio.

So, yes, I love parts of WandaVision. I also hate parts of WandaVision. No, this is not Marvel’s triumphant return like Favloni did with The Mandalorian. This is a mixed bag. This is the hype that isn’t.

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